QUESTIONS & ANSWERS
Excuse Me, but the Postal Dude is Addressing You!
By The Game Doctor

Well, this is my first appearance in the new POSTAL NATION under this venerable pen name. But, as always, the GD is here to answer what questions he can and duck the shit he can’t.

This time, a reader wondered if he could somehow access the various lines of spoken dialogue from POSTAL 2. As you all certainly know, P2 was one of those rare releases that doesn’t have either a musical score or inserted, pre-existing crap by groups like Toad the Wet Sprocket. As a result, our audio had to have a lot of impact and, between the kernels of wisdom caught in the teeth of the PDude and the plaintive wails of the afflicted (I mean, hell, I can’t feel my freakin’ legs either, lady, but you don’t hear ME whining about it), impact is what you get.

So, for those seeking to endlessly replay the sound bites from POSTAL 2, from Habib busting your chops for reading his magazines to the Dude himself, you can go in and try to rip apart the code; go to Daily HaHa which has a great P2 soundboard or find a search engine, enter “POSTAL 2” and “soundboard” and find your own damned audio.

Sorry, the Game Doctor’s been watching too much “House” lately. But the HaHa site is really cool in that it allows you to first choose a P2 character and then select a sound bite from their verbal repetoire.

And that does it for a first visit. Let me look at the x-rays and if you’ve got anything fatal, don’t worry, I’m willing to write prescriptions for ANYTHING.

So remember, my shingle is up, and you can merely tap out to GameDoctorKunkel@gopostal.com if you got a need to know situation in the POSTAL area. In addition to editing this illustrious publication, you can also read my blogs regularly at J2Games.com. Keep your Krotchy-O’s clean and don’t hang out with kids who smoke—they always try to bum yours.

—Bill “The Game Doctor” Kunkel